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There is a controversial debate on whether
sharing information in various areas of study is beneficial or not. While there
are certain advantages of information being open to the public, I believe there
could be several drawbacks in the society by doing so. 문제에서 'scientific research, business and academic world'와 같이 언급했으니 해당 분야에서 상호 공유하는 것으로 파악하는 것이 적절해 보여요. 대중(public앞에 'the'가 꼭 있어야 대중이라는 뜻의 명사가 될 수 있어요)에게 공유하는 것은 개념이 조금 다를 수 있을 것 같아요.
People who support the idea of shared
information point to the benefits it can bring to the society. Firstly, further
and innovative achievements could be made if people were able to get access to
different information. This could allow scholars or business workers to
encounter novel ideas that they have not thought of previously and gain a
broader perspective. Consequently, they can adopt the knowledge they acquired
from such shared information to their work, which could result in improved
performance or achievements. Secondly, there might be educational improvements
by such shared knowledge. For example, by not limiting the results of recent
research projects or discoveries to certain groups of people, many educators
might be able to use those the information to teach the public. Therefore, the
overall levels of education of the people may increase. 서론에서 언급했듯이 이 내용은 연구결과 등을 대중에게 공개하는 내용과 관련되어 있으므로 주제에서 벗어난 것으로 보일 위험이 있어 표시해두었어요. 주제를 정확히 반영하는 내용으로 방향을 더 다듬어보시면 좋을 것 같아요.
Despite the advantages mentioned above,
there are also potential risks of unlimited access to information. One scenario
would be discouraging the original researchers of the information. If the
result of years of hard work and devotion was taken for granted by the public, less
and less people would challenge be challenged to start a project or a research, which
might have a detrimental effect in development in academic fields. Another danger
is that if blue prints of a weapon or a research document on nuclear power end
up in the hands of terrorists, the world might face a threat of terrorist attack
or even war. This would be less likely to happen if such information was
confidential.
In conclusion, although there could be
benefits for developments in society by sharing information, I think the
negative outcomes such as discouraging the scholars and potential threats should
not be ignored. |