■ Direction Read the question below. You have 30 minutes to plan, write, and revise your essay. Typically, an effective response will contain a minimum of 300 words. ■ Question Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Use specific reason and examples to support your answer |
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▶ Topic :
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People today spend too much time on personal enjoyment-doing things they like to do-rather than doing things they should do. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
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▶ Your Answer :
Some people think that these days, these days people do not spend
too much time on what they like to do rather than on what they should do.
However, I believe that these days people spend too much time on what they like
to do rather than on what they should do for two reasons. This is because
spending time on what they like to do enables people to relieve stress in much
stressful situation compare to the past and enjoy a better quality of life.
First, people spend much time on what they
like to do because it enables people to relieve stress in much stressful situation
compare to the past. Understanding how different the situation that people
today are facing from the past and the potential role of spending time on what
they like to do is necessary to substantiate this view. Unlike the past, the
task people should do is dramatically changed. Not only the increase of the
amount task, but also the increase of the importance of creative when they do
the task. This change makes people under great stress. As a method to relieve
stress, people start to carve their own hobbies that are not related to their
tasks and some people are obsessed to them. In this regard, people are spending
much time on what they like to do because it enables people to relieve stress
in much stressful situation compare to the past.
Second, people spend much time on what they
like to do because it enables them to enjoy a better quality of life. In response
to the increasing role of spending time on what people like to do, many expert
opinions and research statistics reinforce the idea that sending time on what
people like to do enables people to learn how to interact with people. In the
past, people were less intentional to participate in social activity because it
was another part of life. However, these days, participating in social activity
becomes one of tasks because of the increase of what they should do. Therefore,
people start to find how to engage in society more naturally. Finally, spending
time on what people like to do is the answer to them because they can share the
idea and spend time together while doing what they like to do. Sometimes, as
people are so desperate to make social friends, they usually tend to have the inclination
to what they like to do rather than to what they should do. In this regard,
people spend much time on what they like to do because it enables them to learn
how to interact with others and enjoy a better quality of life.
To
sum up, I believe that these days, these days people do not spend too much time
on what they like to do rather than on what they should do for the following
reason; spending time on what they like to do enables them to relieve stress
and enjoy a better quality of life. Consequently, the importance of my view
cannot be underestimated for the reason I have mentioned above.
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Q1: 이 문제를 저는 주장문으로 생각했는데 혹시 비교문인가요?
Q2: should 나 can 같이 당위성 질문이나 가능성 질문 같은 경우에는 전개해 나가기 수월한데, 이 문제처럼 "~~하고 있다. 동의하느냐?" 의 현상 질문은 어떻게 전개해 나가는지 잘 모르겠습니다. 제가 제시한 이유들이 적당한지도 잘 모르겠고요.
Q3: 또 항상 BODY 2 중간 쯤에서 시간이 끝나버리는데, 점수에는 영향을 미치지 않는지 궁금합니다.
Q4: 항상 글이 500자 이상으로 길어지는데, 짧게 쓰자니 논거들이 불충분해보여서요. 이 딜레마를 어떻게 해결하면 좋을 까요?
피드백 부탁드려유ㅠ 항상 감사합니다.